Why Does Success Seem To Mean Loveless

My man is way sexier than me, look at his pics if u don't agree, he's got striking features, and I'm one of those talented cute creatures, guess it's all a matter of taste, some think we're rushing into things with haste, but we only live once, and I'd rather not be a dunce, when it comes to love it's not a competition, follow ur heart gut and intuition, otherwise u become numb consumed with regret, ya'll better not be placing relationship bets, I hate evil people rooting for failure, I use my experiences and hurdles like Taylor, put it all into my poetry and music, don't sweep up shit under the rug use it, be smart and learn from ur mistakes, nothing is free easy or cake, at least not the really good stuff, still getting used to the scruff, but my boyfriend likes it, as well as bites shit, like my face lips and butt, I'm working on diminishing this gut, not for any purpose other than being healthy, with u by my side I can be broke yet still wealthy, cuz at the end of the day, I want substance not quick dick or some fantasy kinky lay, he is the one I dream of, taught me what Mary J meant by "Real Love", yes it's true only time will tell, but I'd imagine without him my existence would be hell, break down those walls and out of ur shell, take big risks instead of believing in superstitious imaginary wishing wells, God doesn't hand magical answers, do ya'll think there's a meaning or reason for aids and cancer, while we may be growing older, we're both getting hotter not colder, like fine wine, haven't peaked or reached our potential shine, I have faith the best is yet to come, ain't no one and done, milk me repeatedly until I'm shooting blanks, all these vampires need to retract their fangs, stop draining the life force sucking blood, have hot sex instead of jerking off to filthy smut, ya'll sluts should back the fuck up, control ur addiction of lust, cuz my guy is married, I feel bad for Mariah Carey, to have so much success, but perpetually loveless, I really think most men are threatened, paparazzi Nazis keep invading and meddling, leave the poor woman alone, worry about u and ur own home, if u are booing and poo pooing her for trying, don't act all surprised when, karma comes back to u bitch, how long have u been hitched, like Pac said "only God can judge me now", I never understand or can comprehend how, humans won't open their eyes to see, they're the very definition/epitome of hypocrisy, we reap what we sow, and wanna remind ya'll the one thing I truly know is we don't know what the future holds, but the power to change and be better is in our control, I hope the legacy I leave is filled with empathy consciousness and soul!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/16/17

Resist & Persist For Good Shit To Flourish

There's a tough dichotomy between being open and honest, yet remaining humble and modest, straight forward and direct, but don't fall victim to the mean sarcasm or selfish ego effect, what's better white lies or the blunt truth, be careful what u choose, cuz neither can be taken back, screw omission gossiping assumption and alternative facts, I've had enough of the gay drama and bullshit, u need to learn when someone extends their finger and says pull it, not to gullibly follow thru, or when asked who sings a song say it's u, otherwise u fall for their trap/trick, what's better a dick that's long or thick, prefer cut or uncut, not attracted to politically correct generic dumb fucks, cuz I'm all about chemistry and connection, I'm trying to live my life happy and fulfilled not swayed by negativity's infection, which isn't easy, definitely don't want to be identified as manipulative or sleazy, I accept the consequences for my mistakes, and for the rest of my existence will do whatever it takes, to win back trust, prove to u it's not just sex and lust, I am truly madly deeply in love, and I simply won't walk away or give up, I'm a passionate fighter and stubborn, want to minimize drinking drugging barring and clubbing, to spend more quality intimate fun time just u and me, pretty sure ud agree, we both have plenty of personal stuff to work on, but know this is not some deceptive illusion or con, I wanna be a positive example, and refuse to let random outsiders come between us trying to ruin and trample, the hard work traveling this long lonely windy road, I use my past experiences as lessons to learn how to adapt and grow, please remember tho I am far from perfect, trials and tribulations suck but in the end I find they're worth it, usually atrocity helps provoke real change, this position I'm in is completely off-putting and strange, believe me I'm scared as hell, my insecurities and confusion can seem impossible to show iterate express or tell, worried u won't be there when or if I fell, there's no magical solution potion nor spell, gotta navigate the twists turns valleys and hills, resist and persist even if it kills, it's all about the journey the fight whether u phoenixly resurrect and rise, why do men see vulnerability as weakness and abhor tears being cried in another guy's eyes, it takes such courage and strength, divulging secrets pent up anger frustration and resentment is therapeutic to vent, holding onto that crap, hiding behind an awkward uncomfortable dismissive laugh, is not a good way to deal, only when u can admit how u feel, getting to the heart and root of the pleasure or pain, can knowledge and wisdom be gained, communication's laying the bricks of our relationship's foundation, too much corruption and greed is what's destroying this once sound nation, with a tyrant at the helm, many are disgustingly disgruntled detached and overwhelmed, hopefully this'll lead to some sort of new Renaissance era, where inspiring good music art morals ethics and talent flourish are appreciated prioritized coveted worth more and valued greater/better!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/14/17

Change The Collective's Perspective

Some mornings it's a fight to figure out what to write, should I go deep angry inspirational or just keep it light, I have no control on the soul, guess I'm like the weather both hot and cold, after all I am a Gemini, off stage I'm pretty reserved and shy, not afraid to cry, or ask why, instead of accepting that's the way it is, how come there's no heart or humanity in business, it's simply about the money, but what I find funny, is that it's the root of all evil, brings out the worst in and consumes people, like without it we have no value, now-a-days we work cuz we have to, life is very expensive, the list of debts and bills is quite extensive, seems to be an insurmountable hole, which takes an overwhelming toll, that makes it hard to get up out of bed, do the rich realize they can't take it when they're dead, each day is a struggle, any dents or progress are super subtle, almost nonexistent, when it comes to my music tho I'm persistent, I don't care about the obstacles or paying the price, getting a song played on the radio would be nice, but winning a Grammy would be even better, instead of sending one to Santa I'll pen Pac a letter, telling him how much I love and admire, think tho he was a thug his spirit still rose higher, up to the heavens, u showed me hip hop is service for benevolents, who sacrifice their own life, by sharing their stories and experiences of pain hardship and strife, remember nobody is perfect, helping others is totally worth it, cuz it helps ourselves, I'm not in it for fame or wealth, I sincerely want to connect and relate, there's no such thing as a successful mainstream middle class white rapper who's gay, think it's about fucking time, may not be a freestyler but got sick poetic stream of consciousness rhymes, definitely one of a kind, got lots of hot topics on the mind, I wanna change the collective's perspective, sorry but I don't understand why Bernie wasn't elected, I swear he was our modern day savior, FDR used socialism to make this country greater, capitalism just isn't the answer, sometimes I truly believe human beings are cancer, we always fuck shit up, the only way to heal this world is with the power of love!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/7/17

Let Go The Inconsequential

Rubbernecking is negatively effecting traffic, I get road rage but wish I could just laugh at it, learn to let it go, dismiss the shit as inconsequential, cuz holding on to that level of anger and hate, doesn't stop u from being late, simply exacerbates ur blood pressure rising, people don't appreciate empathy nor compromising, both of which are an art form, love keeps the heart warm, but sometimes it ain't enough, relationships can be tough, especially if ur not getting what u need, selfishness is a big pet peeve, u gotta believe things work out the way they're supposed to, I'm not promiscuously slutty the way gay hoes do, kind of a prude dude, misconstrued as rude, cuz of resting bitch face, finding a soul mate isn't a race, it'll happen when it does, some have multiple loves, while others simply miss out, but if u repetitively pessimistically pout, ull turn off many, if anything I'm overly friendly, and when I'm being nice or polite, ya'll assume I wanna make out blow u or go home with u that night, which couldn't be further from the truth, my boyfriend is a beaut to boot, so I'm not looking for more, nor interested in hookering whores, he's "all the man I need" like Whitney sang, it's never a quick fuck/bang, sex for us takes hours, ur not less than a man for crying liking pink purple Mariah Carey or flowers, usually homophobes are discrete undercover cowards, first to put their asses up and/or wear collars, if they're muscle juice heads or dominant in life, it's ironic they like being humiliated degraded and in bed play the wife, meaning they're submissive or the receiver, I actually feel bad for Michael Jackson and Justin Beiber, they totally missed out on just being kids, read my lips, money isn't the be all and end all, remember the law of gravity what rises must fall, even success comes with a price, normally their love life bites, it's impossible to know who u can really trust, fame and fortune induce lust, it takes passion and guts to fulfill hopes and dreams, nothing is ever as easy as it seems, even being born into wealth, can be detrimental to ur mental and heart health, the specific struggles may vary, but we all have similar instances and feelings of pain envy and happy, one person's trash is another's treasure, failures shouldn't be measured, what's important is how high u bounce back and rise, don't listen to gossip hearsay or lies, get to know and understand first hand, I wonder if God laughs or chuckles when we plan, not a fan of Fantasyland, prefer pools over the beach cuz there's no sand, getting everywhere including the nooks and crannies, terribly miss my grammies and grampies, they used to spoil me to death, with them gone I feel like I'm walking a tight rope without a safety net, but I have faith they've become angels watching over my shoulder, will my legacy be passed down too when it's all said and done and over?

Peace and 1,
JC
6/6/17

Innocence Or Ignorance

Our bickering isn't hateful sickening snickering, in the beginning instead of a baptism like Charmed we'll do a wiccaning, we show love a different way, sarcasm's the gay's quintessential spilling of the T/shade, it's not meant to be nay say, stop reminiscing and vicariously living like ur still in ur hey day, grow the fuck up, oh u don't appreciate when I cuss, well tough luck, notice the scruff, I'm an adult, homosexuality is not a cult, perhaps it could be considered a religion, it's also not a choice or a decision, the amount of negligent ignorance, can no longer pass as unintentional innocence, we need to draw some hard lines, why do they try to dim how bright a star shines, by spreading deadening and upsetting meddling, look at all the evil that's embedding getting and settling, deep within our collective soul, if we don't start accepting climate change is real and man made Earth will become a giant black hole, both the North and South pole, keep losing their cold, ice caps are melting, what's the deal with people bible belting, hating and discriminating in the name of Jesus, the US can't just do what appeases or pleases us, what happened to fighting for the greater good, Republicans aren't doing what they know they should, and it is simply upsetting, how quickly we're forgetting, wondering how we got to this point, I'm beyond irritated and annoyed, I'm wicked pissed off, while ya'll bitterly snicker and scoff, acting selfish arrogant and righteous, seems we can't even fathom let alone fight this, sick and twisted mentality, where sheeple get brave behind virtual reality, so socialism and human interaction becomes numb too awkward or weird, government divides and conquers thru abusing using fear, yet we fall for it every time, excessive greed should be a crime, there's no reason one person family or corporation needs billions of dollars, I feel as tho scholar's degrees are collars, making us slaves to capital and our careers, nobody wants to be a teacher they wanna be JT or Britney Spears, how the heck are u supposed to know, what u want to be or do for the rest of ur life at 17 or 18 years old, we idolize shows like 16 and pregnant or Teen Mom, how do ya'll remain calm, cuz I'm about to lose my cool/shit, I despise his lies and don't like the fact Trump rules one bit, he's making a mockery of our democracy, it's impossible to handle the day to day shockery, there's always something, with the orange pumpkin, I swear he's colluding with the Russians and Putin, terrorism and war are disintegrating and ruining, the whole globe's at odds, please tell me if u think Utopian peace is naive wishful thinking or a complete farce?!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/5/17

  

No Pussies Allowed

Tonight is gonna be incredible, the nice thing about typing instead of writing my lyrics is they're always legible, maybe tho not understood, don't wanna be too book smart nor hood, I'm Italian gangster not ghetto, I'm def thick but not squishy like jello, but I do in fact taste great, think I finally met the man of my dreams/soulmate, fuck all ur jealousy and hate, too impatient to wait and will do whatever it takes, to follow thru on my promise of forever, I won't wanna live unless it's together, cuz we can weather any storm, we define our own relationship rules and norms, it is absolutely true, I unconditionally love u, will u be my one and only, console and comfort me whenever I'm lost insecure or lonely, like Meth and Mary J say "ur all I need to get by", ur the drug Toni Braxton sang about that's "making me high", unless I'm down on the ground on all fours, while our Alessia Cara soundtrack's playing "baby I'm urs", it smells of locker room stink cum and poppers galore, ur stuck with me hubby for richer or poorer, I wanna have pups lil piggies and a bunch of gaybies, ur sexual prowess is extremely lustful like ur rabid with rabies, ur animalistic, threatening to bite my face off cuz ur cannibalistic, even without bath salts, what's with all the mad cat calls, from both men and women, isn't it obvious why I'm ear to ear grinning, we were up the entire night, til the birds were chirping from the morning's first light, shouldn't kiss and tell rather be respectful and polite, being with u just feels right, will u "stay with me" Sam Smith style for the rest of my life, sorry not sorry neither of us is the wife, so take ur ignorant presumptuousness, and stick it up another slut's butt that's not half as juicy or scrumptious, we like to tag team tease, please...ain't no freebies, u gotta work for the honor and privilege, my gorgeous alpha dom stud would be crazy livid, look but don't touch, no pussies allowed we love it rough, a lil exotic and kinky, no rinky dinky or wrinkly, just scruffy young jocks, who worship cock, and if u can't handle this, keep ur tongue off my tit's nips and pits, since it stimulates heavenly bliss, what a shame u missed out on the opportunity to kiss these lips, now ur too late, get irate with fate, destiny has other plans, u can try to divide but ya'll don't really stand a chance, but for a chosen few spectators/fans, u may catch a glance voyeuring while we dirty dance, after all everyone can be enticed and has a price, care to push ur luck and roll the dice, u might get trussed up tight without speech or sight, nobody said life was fair or that we play nice!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/2/17

Defeating Comparing & Competing

I've been on a roller coaster ride, my emotions erratically going from lows to extreme highs, it was my 35th birthday last week, and I'm wondering if I've peaked, too soon or perhaps late, I often wonder if we have a predestined fate or if destiny is a blank slate, in which we have semi control, maybe only God knows, if it even exists, I'd rather use wits and psychological tricks than fists, fighting doesn't seem to solve issues, please stop making me use tissues, I'm tired of crying, from all the back stabbing gossiping and lying, u never get anything in life unless u express it, why second guess shit, follow a combination of logic and gut, can't find love in bars or clubs so I tried Scruff, and it totally worked, just when I got close to happiness so came jealous jerks and that hurt, cuz many claimed to be my friend, I definitely don't like the idea of long time relationships coming to an end, especially over hear say and third party rumors, I'm a hip hop rapper emcee never claimed to be one of those superstar crooners, altho I have a deep raspy old school style voice, who and what u love and are passionate about isn't really a choice, why must I pay the price, for other people's shortcomings regrets and unfulfilled dreams in their own life, I am what I am cuz I work hard and very driven, I'm gracious and giving even on days that aren't Christmas Easter Valentines Day or Thanksgiving, I am simply a genuinely good person, who actively seeks to see the best in people instead of all the evil that's lurking, cuz otherwise I'd never get up out of bed, smoking too much pot got me trapped overthinking in my head, still trying to take each day one moment at a time, having a big heart and lots of empathy shouldn't be a crime, don't say ur fine if ur not, put ur heart and soul in everything and give it all u got, cuz time and life are precious unpredictable not promised commodities, I love Kevin even with his faults flaws and oddities, we can't pick and choose, but u can follow all the rules and still lose, unfortunately nothing seems to be fair or just, gay men in particular are sluts for sex and lust, and it's destroying our reputation and perception, please don't let me be effected by all the bad shit so I become numb untrusting and afraid to show or let in affection, stop underestimating the importance of human interaction and touch, there's absolutely nothing more amazingly beautiful and healing like big bear hugs, fuck fucking or dick sucking I think the most intimate is kissing, I'd rather not start missing truly living cuz I'm too caught up comparing competing hoping and wishing!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/1/17

Concussions Headbutting Nothing

Perfection is similar to the horizon, can never be achieved but we should keep trying and striving, as u approach the line recedes, it ain't really victory when one cheats, anything worth having takes a great deal of hard work, growth occurs more when stemmed from failure pain loss atrocity and hurt, easy is for the sleazy, believe me sweety, being greedy and too needy, everyone will leave me, high and dry, and while ur oblivious wondering why, nice guys finish last, very rarely do u get things u want unless u ask, fuck the past and masks, we've had a lot of laughs, and that's all I could've hoped for, feel like a piece of meat/groped whore, when out at the gay bars or clubs, they all come out of the woodwork when u finally find love, nothing hinders not even with a ring on ur finger, people become thorns and splinters, using attack tactics of divide and conquer, where's human decency respect chivalry valor and honor, it's almost as if we have no values or morals, political differences means no acting cordial, never ending head butting, cuz concussions are nothing, so what if ur beating a dead horse, better than brick walls of course, but yet it seems masochisticness, like ignorance is assumed bliss, until ur not in the know, being out of the loop blows, life is a roller coaster that's just how it goes, upside down twists and turns with highs and lows, hence why it's best, to speak ur mind rather than living with regrets, yes truth is often said in jest, but now ur emotions are a hot mess, Janet wasn't wrong when she sings in her song, "don't know what ya got til it's gone", why is it that u have to lose to gain, knowledge and wisdom ain't the same, it's a plain shame, to only focus on the negativity of rain, it can be beautifully nourishing and replenishing, tears too are healing and cleansing, occasionally we all need a detox, how often do u clean jeans or socks, do u wear deodorant or cologne a lot, publicly burp or fart, followed by an excuse me please, my pits reek but so do his feet, we're both kinda meek and cheap, we leap instead of creep, cuz time is short and precious, karma did curse and bless us, it's a matter of perception, I'd take connection intimacy and affection over a leaky throbbing erection, cuz once u blow ur load, most get up and go, lust is temporary and unfulfilling, u can't rape the willing, bottoming takes practice, are u any good at this, or do u only go one way, vanilla and no role play, keep it spicy, don't make me bleed if u bite me, there are two definitions of fresh, but I digress, this isn't supposed to be a vocabulary lesson, nearly impossible to determine the tone in text messaging, sarcasm gets lost, truth and lies come with costs, if helping others helps ourselves is it the same for hurting, I know evil and the devil are lurking, but staying patient and cognitive, optimistic of the positive, disperse the good thoughts out there in the universe, before things get overwhelmingly worse, stop with the bad what ifs, take all life's experiences and random encounters as gifts, family and friends should add to enhance and uplift, get a fucking grip, fallibility is a part of human nature, pretty much won't ever hate ya, unless u really fuck me over, I'll always be a listening ear consoling soul/shoulder!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/30/17      

Stupefied...Who Knew

It's amazing how my life at 35 seems to be only beginning, unlike my waistline my head hair has been increasingly receding and thinning, but I feel sexier and more loved than ever, altho my rhymes can be truly profound and clever, my intent is to make u think and feel, Kevin makes me know love is actually real, and not just some made up fairy tale, he gives me strength when I'm frail fail or get derailed, he is simply one of a kind, so sexy and absolutely fine, it blows my mind, and he'd rather let me shine, since he's a bit overly humble modest bashful and shy, I'm very proud to shout out loud that he's my one and only guy, not gonna lie, I'm totally stupefied as to why, I've never had someone that attracted to me, the animal magnetism is even easy for others to see, we're constantly turning heads, I don't care what anybody says, hope this honeymoon phase never ends, I'm genuine and loyal to my significant other family and friends, in that specific order, unconditional love has no limits or borders, but I'm not into open relationships at all, I'll always answer the call, cuz I look forward to the sound of his voice, can't fathom or imagine any other better choice, in a sea full of people, his intoxicating pheromoned scent sealed the deal, we were drawn to each other, destined to be star crossed lovers, I knew right at first sight, marriage was no longer a maybe or might, neither of us are stereotypical gays, I'll love him forever ever and always, he made this year's birthday extra special, I'm so glad I never settled, cuz I'm pretty sure I was born to love u, altho the universe can often times appear pointless and cruel, especially with all the awful atrocities and shit we go thru, if I had to go back tho there's nothing I would redo, everything brought me to this point, I feel it in my gut loins heart soul bones and groin, with every ounce and fiber of my being, it was all for a reason and had meaning, I'm completely honored and privileged, u make me laugh and smile without taking advantage of my ticklishness, altho that will definitely be fun, there's so much to look forward to and still yet to come, like Tina Turner sang ur "simply the best", wait til we have more all night hot kinky steamy sex fests, can't tell who's the luckier one, or got the juicier bum bum, I wonder what lollipop they're talking about when they say yum yum, stick a fork in me I'm done, found the love of my life my world my mate, who knew fate would wind up being this great?!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/25/17

Effervescent & Idealistic

I don't always share my poetry on Facebook, but they're on my website if u wanna take a look, what people don't seem to understand, is I write for only one man, me myself and I, the reason or rationale why, is because it is my therapy, a way to deal with and get me, consciousness is sought, by following my own train of thought, cuz even I can confuse myself, being double Gemini doesn't help, many think I'm bipolar or straight up crazy, I just am over analytical worrisome and angsty adhd, especially since tomorrow I turn 35, this is the best year yet cuz I met the love of my life, he is the perfect present, making me feel special and effervescent, like together we can conquer the world, it took a lot of wrong oysters to find the right pearl, he is everything I ever wanted and dreamed of, taught me the definition of true love, reciprocated and beautifully imperfect, fuck cake I want fruity flavored rainbow sherbet, our flag is tasty and delicious, how can anyone hate gays enough to be malicious or vicious, there's already plenty of evil, we need a peaceful political upheaval, the politicians in power, are greedy negligent lying cowards, business has no heart or soul, money is the ultimate goal, hence the term capitalism, it used to be fighting for the greater good was considered nationalism, but now we've gotten corrupted, wait til both civil and world wars have erupted, creating all out chaos and confusion, perhaps peace is simply an idealistic illusion, and I'm naive to keep the faith, I continuously refuse to bow down give up or cave, I will never surrender to hopelessness nor disbelief, it seems we're trapped in an endless time looped cycle of atrocity and grief on repeat, so I try to stay focused on the here and now instead, the moments I get to cuddle and snuggle with my man in bed, it's easy to let the bad stuff pile up out of control, I don't want to drown my sorrows or numb my mind smoking another bowl, I'd rather deal with the reality, we all eventually become a casualty, so live each day to the fullest, whether the Dow is bearish or bullish, materialistic things don't mean shit, when the dust has been bit, dollars don't dictate value, shouldn't work cuz we have to, caught up treasuring possessions, when finding quality human connection is the real blessing, our priorities are askew, so tell me what ur gonna do to contribute, and what will the legacy we leave be, it's totally possible to unite on common ground if we compromise by sometimes agreeing to disagree!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/23/17

Bouts Of Doubt

We all have different perspectives, experiences and trials that have pushed our limits and tested, and the decisions we make define us, love and trust takes time and guts, I never wanna seem righteous, but my mom taught me those that love us may not like us, guess we have to learn how to agree to disagree, not everyone is an eternal hopeless optimist like me, I'm a special rare breed, who has hope faith and believes, that everything happens for a reason and it'll all be ok, personally don't think life would be any easier not being gay, I won't entertain what ifs and wishful thinking, cuz the sky's already fallen and the ship's been sinking, I don't like to wallow in self pity nor doubt, I do realize however people have harder circumstances and more challenging bouts, and tho I may think I know and understand, at the end of the day I'm fallible like every other man, sometimes I don't practice what I preach, bossing someone around isn't a good way to teach, it's better to lead by example, perhaps I'm more than u can handle, but yes I'm stubborn and won't give up, especially when ur just a lil down on ur luck, been there done that, I'll always have ur back, if u let me in, alphas often over compensate when feeling more vulnerable than their shin, sensitivity doesn't make men weak, u grow more thru mistakes failure and defeat, words too like actions have consequences, why are we so divided by imaginary walls and fences, fucking up the ebb and flow, do u get the ideas of manifest destiny and reap what u sow, stop dominating and controlling the conversation, look at all the energy worrying is wasting, say what ull do and mean and do and mean what u say, I'd never intentionally hurt u by asking u to change, this is who I am, if anybody can relate without judgment I can, stop assuming I want to take a break, who cares if we're late, it doesn't seem to bother u when it's time to leave, tip toeing around issues is a big pet peeve, double standards are annoying, I'm sorry but driving gets my blood pressure boiling, which in turn negatively effects u, most can't face the truth, being an empath I'm like a mirror, can see solutions in others clearer, often neglecting my own short comings and faults, get aggressively assertive with passionate verbal assaults, it's not in my nature to be violent, sit back relax just be quiet and silent, I'm not ur wife, I may be submissive in the bedroom but not in life, I'll always fight for what's right, try to measure my bite, cuz I don't want to flag with black and blue, ever be the source of ur pain a scar or bruise, calm ur ego and pride, maybe I should've given u what u needed which was some space and a good cry!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/22/17

Love's Beyond Time

We all have good days and bad, I'd prefer to make u happy not mad or sad, since u bring me so much joy, I love being ur lil pig pup boy, ur everything I've ever wanted dreamed and fantasized about, I still don't know why or how, I mean I must have more luck than I thought, I never thought I'd be caught, always been told I'm too intense by other men, kink for me is meditational helping to find my zen, but my insatiable appetite freaks many out, I definitely don't want to instigate another bout, simply expressing myself, desperately trying to help, get me in the right mindset, love competing and making bets, loser bottoms for the night, of course we can also have a wrestling match/fight, but I don't wanna break another rib, totally down with kids, but u will forever be my number one priority, the king of our dynasty in regards to hierarchy, will risk sinning or an eternity in hell worshiping u as a false God, we both gotta learn each other's ticks and tricks to getting rock hard, explore more of ur fetishes, I love u in spite of ur past flaws and blemishes, it's nonjudgmental and unconditional, sex isn't pivotal or super critical, a definite bonus for sure, concerned more with having a solid foundation or core, don't need a piece of paper or a ring, to show and flaunt ur my one and only my everything, it's in my smile and radiating aura, I'll travel to St. Louis Seattle Portugal Guam or Bora Bora, to the ends of the world the universe and even beyond, we have a deep meaningful everlasting soul mate kind of a bond, TLC described u with the album entitled "Crazy Sexy Cool", I hope u never ever get tired of the endless I love yous, cuz I'll constantly shower u with affection, u may not be the Lord and savior but ur absolutely a blessing, the object of my obsession, life's way too short for regretting, so let's live in this moment in the here and now, keep intimacy private not flaunting it in big crowds, have faith courage and guts, remember to first focus and work on just us, no walking away, please don't be afraid to say what u gotta say, I can take it, won't fake shit, stay genuine and honest, remain humble and modest, it'll all turn out fine, if we can be patient and give it time!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/19/17

Forever & Ever & Always

Trying to get my self esteem and confidence back, after some douche called me an ugly troll that's fat, I know it's not true, he was being a rude fool, thought he could hurt me with words, I don't pay attention to slutty lying jerks, but he caught me at a vulnerable time, was struggling to find my shine, especially standing next to my man, both men and women are fans, he is so sexy and beautiful, makes me feel puppy like and youthful, I can admit I'm cute as hell, but if we were at a ball he would be belle, yet give me a mic and the stage, and spectators will stop to gaze engage and rave, my talent has mass appeal, I'm wicked genuine honest uncensored and conscious when I express how I feel, whether thru poetry or music, I take my life experience and use it, to not only better myself but inspire others, in bed with my guy even in winter we don't need covers, cuz we're both furnaces producing major heat, it's hard to tell who's got the sweatier and smellier pits and feet, I'm Italian and he's Portuguese, he's super sarcastic competitive overprotective but also very sweet, totally smitten and obsessed with me, we hold one another's key, not into that open relationship shit, I think this is some forever and ever kind of love not just a blip, for better or for worse, whatever hurdles lurk, and when things get too much or tough, we will help lift each other up, fuck red bull he gives me wings to fly high, there's no scientific explanation why u can even ask Bill Nye, sometimes like magic u know, we speak in secret language and code, he reads me like a book, I eat he cooks, the crook stole my heart, don't need elaborate sides or garnishes I'll take him a la carte, he's simply that special, I'm the fruit so he's the vegetable, we go hand in hand, always is the ultimate goal/plan!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/1/17

My Love My Heart

I'm exhausted but still up, finding the will to work thru love, and a large ice coffee, there's a fine line between frugal and paupery, had an impromptu date night, I instantly glowed upon first sight, he makes my days, teasing the envious gays, with his sexy good looks, plus he's domesticated and knows how to cook, every minute I'm with him, I've got an ear to ear grin, some say a devilish smirk, we both can be sarcastic jerks, but that's part of our charm, we mean absolutely no harm, just playful fun, I can't help grabbing his buns, and he loves sniffing mine, every morning he looks forward to my new rhyme, he's super supportive, strict tho when it comes to punishment or being rewarded, I guess I get caught up wanting all the attention, hope patience is one of those life lessons, u learn over time, foreplay gets me primed, all hot and horny, ya'll may find our pet names kinda corny, but the tokens of affection won't fade, neither will the relentless shade, we have our lil inside jokes, Phil Collins and how many songs Mariah Carey actually wrote, he's usually wrong, wants me to make my own beats for my songs, I love that he challenges me, with our combined talents we, are an unstoppable force, many are wondering who's boss, but we are versatile equals, what's the big deal, our roles and positions aren't really ur business, believe u me our sexual chemistry is the shiznit, ya'll don't have to worry, he's my hubby til dead and buried, or maybe cremated, I am truly happy and elated, I know it's cheesy, it's not the exact famous line from Jerry Maguire but he completes me, nothing will tear us apart, cuz not only do u have but u are my heart!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/17/17

Awe Shucks Sir

I'm crazy baby in love with u, am I a buffoon saying it too soon, whoops-a-daisy, ya'll haters don't phase me, but his insecurity does, I wanna shower him with kisses and hugs, and take him away, to a much happier place, where he is appreciated, it's sad when family makes u feel depreciated, I think he's simply amazing, we're all constantly changing, I wanna make u better, every poem lately has been a love letter, I know ur doing all that u can, having money or a place of ur own doesn't make u a man, it's the dick between ur legs, sorry for the side effects of the psych meds, I too have some problems, and in time we'll solve em, I ain't worried, wish my birthday would get here in a hurry, cuz I want u so bad, I hate how she makes u so mad, fuck her, awe shucks Sir, u rock my world, we're like chocolate and vanilla swirl, a tasty treat, we were destined to meet, star-crossed, ur a sexy boss, and I'm proud to be ur slave, like Austin Powers says "oh behave", "do I make u horny", everyone warned me, ull find it when u stop looking, was never into online hookering, but I'm glad I took a chance, I like to sing and u dance, so let's join hands, compromise and try to understand, relationships take dedication hard work and sacrifice, u are the light and the love of my life, it just feels right, I even love to fight, cuz make-up sex is the best, whether u wear a leather harness hat jock or vest, I settled for more never less, whatever happens next, I know ull be there by my side, thru high or low tide, together we enjoy the ride, what we have is something people dream of that money can't buy, ur not shy, proclaiming u have eyes for ur one and only guy, ur very over protective, but we've both been infected, with the poison of Cupid's arrow, lust is superficial and shallow, our love is profound and deep, I want u to be the first thing I see and the last before I fall asleep, ur not just what I want but what I need, ur more important to me than the air I breathe, u should know and trust that, and I will always have ur back!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/16/17

Ride By My Side

They keep asking why ur with him, but I won't let my insecurities begin to win, cuz I honestly don't know why either, I feel fat shirtless or wearing a wife beater, yet I push myself to do it anyway, that's just the way of the gays, superficial ruthless and petty, I think we were both just ready, I don't know how I snagged him honestly, he's super fucking sexy and that's putting it modestly, plus he's got a killer personality drenched in sarcasm, I love teasing him to the point of twitching throbbing and spasming, simply because for some reason I can, he is so rugged handsome and all man, I have to pinch myself often to see if I'm dreaming, I never want to lose this feeling, I'm head over heels smitten in love, I can't seem to ever get enough, and it's weird to know that it's completely mutual, the odds of me finding anyone more compatible is incomputable, he is absolutely my dream guy, without him I'd die and wouldn't even wanna be alive, he's brought so much joy to my life, from the start it just felt right like lust at first sight, then the more I got to know, the harder it became to try and let go, even a few days a part, weighs heavy on my heart, I want to be with him forever and always, wish it could be no work and all play, wouldn't that be the greatest, by no means am I an ageist, but it's nice to be with an adult not a boy, it's never my intent to harass be too needy or annoy, he is truly addicting, even when I'm sleeping and fantasizing it's him I'm picturing, hope he's my last, so the future isn't anything resembling my past, where I was lonely unfulfilled bored and alone, he makes me imagine being married with children living in a beautiful home, who would've thought, I could get caught, he stole my soul, filled in the empty hole, making my existence complete, giving me strength when I was weak, can accomplish conquering the world with u by my side, for the first time I'm actually learning to enjoy this crazy ride!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/15/17

Can't Make This Shit Up

No need for ur drama bs and childish games, grow the fuck up and use ur brain, this is real life not high school, ur coming across as an immature tool/fool, it's pretty plain to see, this is all out of jealousy, don't u know I'm an empath, can see thru players and fakers fast, u really don't have a chance in hell, I've been struck by true love's spell, my man is the perfect fit, even more so then my lyricism he's a divine gift, and the best part is we've only just begun, wait til we get to the real fun, it'll be wicked hot and steamy, cuz he's so sexy and dreamy, fulfills all my wants and needs, especially love that he's open minded piggy and kinky just like me, we are a great match, he's such a badass with his piercings and tats, but I totally enjoy making him smile and laugh, giving him shit wit sarcasm and sass, simply appreciate his company, him busting my balls making fun of me, being gassy and not as good as him at pool, he is the epitome of suave and cool, both men and women stop to stare, which doesn't bother me I just don't care, I take it as a huge compliment, I mean I'm still shocked with astonishment, an alpha of his caliber, would consider being my master, is such a privilege and honor, wonder when I'll get my diamond collar, I'm sure I'll be on a short leash, so his mind can be at ease and have peace, poor thing worries like crazy, and never ceases to amaze me, he's everything and more, in sickness and in health for richer or poorer, til the end of time, like Brandy and Monica sing "the boy is mine", some expressions can't be captured in rhyme, trying to get ready and primed, what's a word greater than love, I'll let ya'll know when we make one up!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/12/17

Heaven Sent 2 Kevins

Haven't thought about him in a hot minute, guess that means we're finally finished good riddance, thank god ur gone, I swear ur the devil's spawn, thinking I was obsessed with u, ur such a fucking fool, was just trying to be a friend, now u will never be in my life again, and I've made room for two new Kevin's, one keeps me grounded while the other one lifts me up to the heavens, I'm such a lucky guy, so happy I could cry, tears of joy tho, can't believe how fast I've grown, reminded that everything happens for a reason, Mikey was like that horrific winter season, about 3 or 4 years ago, karma will get that slutty douche bag piece of shit hoe, but u know what I forgive him, that's how the healing begins, so I can move on, won't let myself get jaded thinking everybody's out to dupe and con, but also don't wanna be too gullible, did u ever see the movie with Nick Nolte and Julia Roberts "I Love Trouble", cuz that defines my man, totally mystifying and unplanned, maybe ya'll aren't able or capable of understanding, it's like preferring Tom Brady over Peyton Manning, yes I'm gay and used a football reference, a lack of monogamy in the lgbtq community is incessant, what's the point in being open, all I can dream about is when we're eloping, yet I'd rather be like Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell, fuck all that marriage hustle and bustle, my love isn't a business, I can tell many of ya'll are jealous and already miss this, and I still wish u find happiness and bliss, experience true love's eternal kiss, cuz life is short, and it's so much better to have a cohort, so neither of u walks alone, my top 3 Tupac tracks are "Unconditional Love" "Thug Mansion" and "Happy Home", but don't get me wrong, I like most of his songs, and the reason I write or type, is cuz vocalizing freestyling and expressing my feelings in the moment is still a fight, I am extremely bashful and insecure, sometimes it's tricky finding the right words, u make me feel things I've never felt before, and now that I've experienced what Mary J's "Real Love" and friendship is all about I want more!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/11/17

Unclutch The Crutch

Can't tell if I'm crazy or drunk in love, the feeling is insatiable and I can't get enough, it's not just a fuss of lust, I don't like to clutch onto anyone or anything using them as a crutch, hence why I took a 90 day break from pot, I was smoking a lot, probably too much, it took a tremendous amount of will power and guts, cuz it's been a huge part of my life, often how I dealt with pain anger stress and strife, but that's definitely not healthy, and it gave people the wrong impression when they smelled me, I was a functioning stoner, it helped make me comfortable being a loner, after all who could love a freak, too intense serious and deep when he speaks, very overwhelming to many, I'm simply sarcastic and genuinely friendly, often confused as sexual advances, I'm extremely passionate and brave taking risks and chances, to fulfill my big dreams, nothing is impossible as it seems, u gotta be willing to work hard, success takes perseverance dedication and smarts, I know ya'll think I'm crazy, but music saves me daily, I'm determined to get that Grammy, despite ur pessimistic cynicism understandably, please don't laugh tho, crushingly stifling goals hopes and wishes so casual, I try to always be supportive, especially to the significant others and jobs ya'll have courted, over the years, I challenged u to conquer ur fears, while the gossips snickered and sneered, making fun of disadvantaged calling them gay fags or queers, no wonder why, I tried to deny lie and hide, who wants to be the butt of a joke, constantly told there's a special place in hell by the old folk, the older generations are the most discriminatory, I wanna be the story how a gay white rapper rose to fame and glory, showing young kids, it doesn't matter what color u are or what ur sexuality is, breaking down ignorant stereotypes boundaries and myths, everybody has their own unique purpose and gifts, never stop being who u are, only u set life's standards and pars!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/10/17

Jealousy Is Flattering

Without u I feel incomplete, wishing time flies by during the week, so we can be together again, I love showing u off to my friends, ur just so sexy, and bring out the best in me, u make me smile non stop, I love people's assumptions of who's on bottom or on top, it's none of their damn business, maybe we will have a couple of kids, or travel the world instead, we can sleep when we're dead, crazy amounts of sex, relieves tension and stress, our aura's become rejuvenated, keep us from being consumed with hatred, and replaced with romantic lust, relationships are based on honest communication and trust, I only have eyes on u, I guess it's true I get a bit jealous too, but damn ur such a hot stud, I hope I am enough, cuz ur visually superficially stunning, whenever u call I will come running, to be safe in ur arms, u protecting me from harm, it's hard to remain calm, don't tell her this but ur as good of a cook if not better than my mom, ur quite domesticated, we're both investigative, not falling for gossip and rumors, humans are inclined to bloopers, completely fallible making mistakes, why ya'll gays gotta be slutty nutty fakes, I mean seriously ya'll are crazy, sending nudes to my bf doesn't phase me, cuz I'm all the man he needs, I know how to tease and please, and like a genie in a bottle he rubs me the right way, we aren't ashamed to say, that we both fell hard and fast, but determined to be each other's last, it ain't about cash, body mass or who's got the fatter ass, u can try to steal him, but u should know we won't let evil win, don't forget love conquers all, ya'll have some balls and gall, I'm ultimately really flattered, ull wind up with ur ego bruised and battered, if u don't learn some respect, haven't u heard about cause and effect, what goes around comes around, to home wreckers karma is profound, go find a man of ur own, if ur lucky we might toss the pigs and pups some sloppy seconds or a bone!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/9/17

Pure Love

Please don't ever leave, cuz I don't think anyone else could put up with or love me, especially the way u do, look at what we've been thru, in just a short period of time, there's this amazing comfort knowing I'm urs and ur mine, each moment together, I truly treasure, and it's not even about the sex, with u by my side I feel we can conquer whatever comes next, u are my strength and light, I even love when we argue and fight, cuz it shows our passion, I can't get enough of ur reactions and laughing, guess I really am such a tease, I aim to pleasure and please, but with u I don't even have to try, one simple text and ur hateful member will rise, u must have the patience of a saint, if I did those things to anybody else they'd probably faint, or run out the door in a heart beat, between my pits ass farts and feet, my smells are all man, fuck Peter Pan, I don't like hairless boys, I love a deep voice that makes noise and still plays with toys, cuz they can be fun at any age, don't hate on this gay's kinky ways, everyone's got preferences and fetishes, for me and my music it's not about the beats but the messages, I like to make ya'll think, by pushing people to the brink, they learn limits and boundaries, the level of ignorance tho dumbfounds me, ur never too old to learn, always have hope faith believe and yearn, shouldn't give up, cuz The Beatles were right "all u need is love", and thanks to him, my happily-ever-after can begin, I'll keep ya'll posted, better be able to handle being roasted, as I air out dirty laundry, there's a fine line between classy and tawdry, my humor isn't cheap, figure out how to sow if u wanna reap, stop letting opportunity pass u by, over analyzing why, when anxiety is building inside, quiet the thoughts in ur mind, breathe thru the panic, is life a result of God's or the Devil's antics, it doesn't matter, I'm not that good of an actor, when I say something I mean it, I won't lose control and fiend shit, addicts do have a tendency, to get caught up in codependency, but so what, I feel it in my heart and soul and gut, ur all I need and more than enough, this must and gots to be true unconditional pure love!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/8/17

The Lucky One

I don't wanna live without u, never knew love til u taught me how to, it's pure and true, finally found my Cinderfella's shoe, it's big and it's stinky, thank god he's open minded and kinky, but that's only the half, he's obsessed with my furry Italian ass, I'm addicted to his Dastardly Dog laugh, his complimentary sarcasm and sass, he's so sexy rugged and manly, totally gets and understands me, a bit over protective and jealous, of course his cock is super overzealous, usually popping out and hard, he completely kidnapped and stole my heart, takes away all my insecurities and qualms, so safe and secure when wrapped in his arms, it's impossible to keep calm, I'm his sub and he's my dom, but with us it's 50/50, nifty how he uplifts me, in actuality we're both vers, used to think when it comes to relationships I was cursed, cuz I was always the best man never the groom, I love when he walks into the room both men and women swoon, proud to be by his side, the day I met him I truly came alive, not gonna over analyze why, if he leaves me I'd die, he's my better half, helps make me more grateful and appreciative of what I have, yet he still remains modest and humble, always there when I tumble stumble or fumble, cuz none of us are perfect, he makes every struggle I've gone thru in life worth it, it really is about fucking time, I'm all his and he's all mine, it's on, like Donkey Kong, but not a competition of who loves who more, can't wait to see and experience what our future has in store, I'm sure lots of memorable fun, I know he thinks he is but I really am the lucky one!  

Peace and 1,
JC
5/5/17

Ruining Confusing Illusion

Different doesn't always mean better, Trump proved that now more than ever, I'm not saying Bernie is a saint, but thinking socialism is communism is insane, it just isn't true, when the dollar fails what will capitalism do, too few have all the money, why is it when people dress in drag or hide behind a screen they get cunty, so genuine I see thru illusion, feeling empathy all the time can get confusing, cuz it's hard distinguishing ur shit from mine, enough with the reply I'm fine, relationships need honest communication, is it time yet for minority unification, when we come together as one, evil will be shunned, this past year it's reared its ugly head, appeared the virtuous good were all dead, we seemed to have lost our morality and manners, with the evolution of human look-a-like robots we'll need soul scanners, love is what separates us, to deny gays marriage isn't fair or right but totally unjust, it takes guts to come out of the closet, did u know in some states landlords are required to pay interest on ur security deposit, what's with all the exemptions and loopholes, I'm so sick of the deplorables and easily dupables, look gullible is written on the ceiling, all lives matter have purpose and meaning, no one is above anybody else, where is the wealthy's compassion to help, especially the poor, the greedy continue to want more and more, but there isn't endless limitless growth, the middle class must keep the faith and have hope, remember love does conquer all, and the law of gravity states that which rises will eventually fall, lady liberty lost her grace, politicians will lie and say anything to save face, utopia is a fictitious place, exploring space is never a waste, since we're destroying mother Earth, ignoring man made global warming makes us doomed and cursed, it's scientifically proven, guess the devil won't stop til everything is destroyed and ruined!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/4/17

What The Power Of Love Does

Words can't even seem to express, just how crazy obsessed, I am for my man, ya'll don't understand, I have never felt like this, thought bliss simply didn't exist, but now I know, I had to get my ducks in a row, and get my shit together, yet he somehow still makes my life complete and so much better, the way I hope I do for him, fuck those people who think we're living in sin, it's 2017, we're not trying to change what u believe so let us be, straight's don't own the word marriage, and adoption should never be disparaged, everybody deserves love but especially kids, stop dictating how u think others should live, what if u've got bad blood, sometimes when it's from family and friends it's overwhelmingly too tough, u really need to feel special, u could never be regrettable cuz ur not only memorable ur unforgettable, on my mind and in my heart and soul, my baby's got a strong hold, making me safe and secure, the addictive thirst is real and pure for sure, don't get shit twisted or confused, there will be absolutely no more abuse, we will be each other's protection, I will smother u with attention and affection, u are my king, fuck what anybody else thinks, I've had it with all the jealousy anger and hate, let me take u away from that god awful place, wash away all the pain, make our magical Utopian kingdom come alive and u reign, with me by ur side every single step of the way, and I will never give up compromise or cave, when it comes to u, there ain't nothing I won't do, to prop u up, help u realize ur not just enough, ur my everything, u give music meaning and the reason I have passion when I sing, I honestly never knew what real unconditional love was, it's truly amazing what the power of finally finding it does!

Peace and 1,
JC
5/1/17