Strive To Thrive & Have Hope Tho

It's weird how often in sobriety, we develop high anxiety, perhaps drugs just delay the inevitable, my sexy Portuguese chef of a boyfriend never makes anything inedible, he is plain incredible, tasty and delectable, I'm the lucky one, he knows how to have fun, but also handle shit, I have ginormous man tits, yet he still thinks I'm juicy, always so worried and scared he's gonna lose me, realistically we both know that's not the case, after all everyone makes mistakes, and obviously has a past, gotta be careful not to rush things too fast, like moving into an apartment together, vacationing buying a house marriage kids or whatever, will cross those bridges when we get there, I don't live life in fear, believe me I very much care, altho sometimes I sleep bare, I'm not necessarily a nudist, u underestimate the horniness/eroticism ur sweaty scent and pheromones induced, especially after a long hard day of work, u know there's nothing more I want than to jerk burst and squirt, give u my milk, ur a definite dilf, or at least u will be, when u die they better kill me, cuz I can't live without u, u can't fight female fans or bout dudes, just cuz ur jealous, at times u can be overprotective and overzealous, I get it babe, ull have better days, when we sleep under the same roof in our bed, ur determined to have children and wed, which don't get me wrong I mean isn't bad, I just don't wanna make u mad, but I still gotta tour write more songs and do music til I win that Grammy, most men couldn't stomach or stand me, particularly my kinks fetishes and snoring, I've heard before I'm too intense serious and deep it becomes mind numbingly dumb and annoyingly boring, but we can't help who we are in our heart, don't wanna fit in be normal or stupidly par, I'm not ur average Joe, I want major cheddar that green/cabbage yo, so creatively weird original yet freaky, don't know why but leather dom daddies speak to me, guess I love or lust the look, fuck watching porn or reading erotica from a magazine or book, I want the real thang baby, no ifs ands buts or maybes, whip out the rubber sheets and slings, let the piss and cum fun begin, since u flag yellow and white, I'd like to add a lil gray so I can't push back stop u or fight, of course u may take a light bite, make sure to clean out and use a wet wipe, the king's about to mount his queen, we make a hot sexy unique masculine team, we're each other's ideal wish fantasy and dream, nothing is as perfect as it seems, maybe it's like the horizon line receding as we approach, finding balance and equilibrium is impossible but we can always continue to strive to thrive and have hope tho!

Peace and 1,
JC
7/26/17

The Consciousness & Ability To Think's Extinct

What if it's not ur day or week month or year, do ur fears debilitate u to tears, cuz only u have the power, not to run away hide and cower, what if it's ur last shot, shouldn't u feel obligated to give it all u got, why do so many people simply give up, even with money life is unfulfilling without love, I am truly grateful and blessed, my man is completely obsessed, and it makes me smile ear to ear, it's amazing to know someone cares, other than blood relatives and family, I often wonder if acquaintances can really stand me, or if it's just a front, I can be an absolute asshole/cunt, altho I don't have one, some swears are fun, and emphasize a harsher tone, I am fascinated by double entendres like sex fuck or bone, usually I'm a dirty birdy, constantly misunderstood to be overly flirty, when that's just me being nice, can't help if ya'll like to swipe right, I'm actually flattered, I love Joss Stone's songs "Bruised Not Broken" and "Torn And Tattered", one's more uptempo while the other's a ballad, sorry not sorry but I can't stand DJ Khaled, he's annoying as shit, he's a producer that can't spit, so basically he plays artist's music, giving credit to the beat maker is abusive, instrumentals are clutch, but blunts aren't zig zags gotta use a dutch, prefer a green leaf, do u even listen to or hear the words I speak, I'm glad u like my sound, but is it a timeless classic and lyrically profound, I wanna touch and move souls, not interested in dancy superfluous lip-syncing shows, I've got real talent and skills, went from smoking pot to taking psych pills, and I wonder if I'm feeding the demon, why am I so afraid of swallowing semen, look at what the pharmaceutical industry has done to medicine, it's no longer about making the sick better it's about profits which is so American, we're the country of the excessive and greedy, so selfish we can't help our own needy, yet we will spread war in the name of democracy, we are the epitome and very definition of hypocrisy, always an egotistical hidden agenda, we will use nuclear force if ya'll don't surrender, ever notice the countries that don't use a Rothschild owned central bank, the list of 7 in 2000 has now shrank, to North Korea being the last one left, does anybody out there agree that taxation is theft, how about thinking 9/11 was an inside job, our safety security and peace of mind were robbed, all to invade Afghanistan and Iraq, then Libya and Sudan were attacked, last but not least Obama got Cuba and Iran, when will the world wake up and take a stand, it's like evil has taken over control and corrupted, wait til Mother Nature's anger and wrath has erupted, not even the wealthy few, can reverse time or redo, once the damage has been done, in the end history proves humanity has never won, like the dinosaurs we will become extinct, don't let them take away ur consciousness and ability to think!

Peace and 1,
JC
7/25/17

Over Shoulder The Weight Of The World

Things have been looking up, since I've fallen in love, but it doesn't mean I am naive, about the world around me, these are very dark times, we're all searching for a guiding light to shine, it's like people have given up hope, when will we realize u can't have endless growth, ridiculous amounts of record profits, will this President ever stop it, making a mockery of our system, not only should he be impeached but put in prison, along with many members of Congress, it's almost impossible to speak of any politician with fondness, except my man Bernie Sanders, he doesn't claim to have learned all the answers, but he identifies problems and has many good ideas, doesn't harp on manipulating the masses using fears, so what if he's old and his hair is disheveled, are u aware of all these corrupt mother fuckers who lie cheat steal and embezzle, multiple bankruptcies isn't the solution, how can anyone deny climate change is from man made carbon pollution, these alternative facts are quite simply confusing, I don't find his damaging our collective reputation amusing, in fact I'm rather insulted and shocked, I swear Trump is negligent and speaking half cocked, I still can't even get over he actually won, he better be a one and done, cuz I don't think the country could survive a second term, when will humanity stop repeating history and actually learn, better yet evolve, I get existential questions aren't easy to solve, but in the grand scheme of things, we're not puppets on strings, we should be able to think for ourselves, what happened to the notion of civil servants who help, I'm just so over the modern era, no one lives for the greater good or tries to make life better, if not for us then for future generations, instead we're consumed by selfish greedy consumption and divisive discriminating hating, it's mind boggling and rather disgusting, there's no more rational debating or discussing, it goes right to insults and name calling, perhaps we will be on the same page when acid rain's falling, or like in China where they wear surgical masks, why can't we fix the mistakes made in the past, the reason I ask this, is how come we don't legalize marijuana and use hemp to make gas paper and plastics, at least then they will be biodegradable, the youth are totally able and capable, and more importantly willing to change, it's adults that are strange and deranged, unable to modify and adapt, even when the dollar and economy are about to collapse, I don't say this with sarcasm or sass, but society is literally a pain in the ass, after all I am gay and have bottomed, each and every one of us shouldn't judge cuz differences and issues we got em, by definition we're inherently naturally fallible, I respect that some actually have faith and believe God and Jesus are palpable, nobody knows who's wrong or right, I'm terrified we've lost the willingness and know-how to fight, perhaps we've become too numb and dumb from being coddled and spoiled, many terrorist plots I'm sure have been foiled, we're ignoring the fact there hasn't been war on our own soil, this melting pot has definitely come to a boil, now it's bubbling over, am I the only one who feels the weight of the world on my shoulders?

Peace and 1,
JC
7/21/17

Be A Better Trend Setter

Why is it so damn hard to save money, the amount my temp agency takes from me isn't funny, it's quite disturbing and alarming, this capitalistic consumer culture is actually debilitatingly harming, and the economy is fucking shit, sometimes when I stop to think I can't handle it, life can get super overwhelming, and our lousy government ain't helping, in fact they keep fucking things up worse, I swear sometimes I truly believe humans are cursed, I mean Jesus made us all born with original sin, how come the nice guy always finishes last and never seems to win, just the sound of Trump's voice gets me agitated, the US is a melting pot but it's gotten coagulated, is anyone else aggravated, wish I could proudly proclaim I finally made it, unfortunately music is still only a hobby, sick and tired of taxes robbing me, continuously stuck in the red, I bet I'll be in debt til I'm dead, and that's a wicked scary thought, perhaps I should've been more frugal and thoughtful of what I bought, but don't I deserve to splurge once in a while, I swear the people hurting the most have the biggest smile, at least that applies to me, right now I rhyme for free, which makes me feel worthless, will our collective soul ever resurface, in business u must be ruthless and have assertiveness, how do little kids already know their path or purpose, I get jealous seeing parents selling homes to fulfill their child's dream, being rich and famous isn't all it's cracked up to be or as fabulous as it seems, everyone has different classes of problems, sorry not sorry but PREP doesn't replace condoms, there's no magical pill to regrow hair or lose weight, good old fashion diet and exercise is the only healthy way I'm afraid, most are much too lazy and complacent, it doesn't help incessantly bitching and complaining, but sometimes it's necessary to vent, it should be totally legal to medicinally get bent, fuck pharmaceutical pills and drugs, the solution to depression unhappiness and hatred is simply love, sex is considered exercise too, it's never wise to tell white lies dude, who are u to decide if I can handle the truth, some existential answers are impossibly aloof, what should we value more religious faith or tangible science, freedom comes with resistance revolution and defiance, war just might be inevitable, perhaps people are by nature inequitable, and like perfection it's hopeless to try or strive to achieve, why do most men believe emotional vulnerability means weak, I never understood why in business u can't have heart, what's better being book or street smart, in my opinion it's best to have a combination of both, what we can do is have hope, that we can still change for the better, focus on leading by example and be a trend setter!

Peace and 1,
JC
7/20/17

Relaxing Or Taking Action

There are many times I'm left pondering, was I better off wandering, then coming back to settle in Rhode Island, cuz what I'm finding, is nothing but brick walls and road blocks, lots of flakes fakes pussies and cocks, who pretend to wanna make a difference, but in the blind of an instant, will turn around and stab u in the back, instead of cooperating most queens defensively attack, like if I succeed they don't, hip hop's negativity is overblown, just because it's all ghetto gangsters talking money drugs bitches and hoes, doesn't mean that's the lyrical content of Joe's, I'm all about truth love justice equality and consciousness, seriously enough with this obnoxiousness, that music can't be too intelligent or thought provoking, I've even given up the whole pot smoking, so I could be taken more seriously, I'm continuously trying and striving fiercely, to make my hobby a business, I wanna prove to all the youngsters even for gay white boys our options are limitless, by having commercial success, winning a Grammy would be the best, finally put ancient stereotypes to rest, music overall is lackluster and a mess, what happened to inspiration, I miss epic and legendary albums like "Thriller" "Nevermind" "The Chronic" "The Miseducation Of Lauryn Hill" or "Rhythm Nation", it would seem we lost our heart and soul, and we're trapped in a big black hole, I was hoping for a second Renaissance, now we buy dumbed down whack crap with such ease and nonchalance, I don't even remember the last time I was moved or goose bumped, there's nothing like a power ballad when u get dumped, now everything has to be catchy dancy or have a hard beat, can anyone tell me how u become a member of the elite, does the Illuminati really exist, why can't artists appeal to adults instead of just kids, tricking them with shticks and gimmicks, ever since video killed the radio star it's all about the image, which in my opinion is bull, there's no reason my performance schedule isn't full, other than my community hasn't lifted me up, aren't ya'll tired of hearing these useless shmucks, who are totally uneducated and unrelatable, I seriously question if rap is even savable, it used to stand for rhythm and poetry, I try not to be preachy judgmental or too woe is me, but we all have a various array of struggles, heavy metal doesn't induce relaxation or cuddles, tone effects mood, inflection can change the attitude, no matter what, getting on stage takes guts, everyone wants the fortune and fame, but most don't wanna work that hard or play the game, which is totally understandable, one man's biggest fear another can handle, just gotta find ur gifts purpose and passion, in the end it's a matter of whether ur busy relaxing or taking action!

Peace and 1,
JC
7/19/17

More Revolutionary War For The Poor

Am I too intelligent and woke, why are the benevolent broke, the US has become a laughing stock/joke, I truly miss the eloquent way Obama spoke, he had such grace and class, Trump is such a pain in the ass, so inexperienced derogatory and unrefined, if he were a type of cancer it would be malignant not benign, supposedly a brilliant business tycoon, if u file bankruptcy 5 times u should be defined buffoon, he was spoiled born into to the rich 1% elite, wish Bernie was able to compete, I would've settled for Hilary shattering the proverbial glass ceiling, but honestly it's time for an indy third party to rule, having the first black president was cool, what about not only a woman but a lesbian, who isn't just a thespian, someone who is actually elected by and is for the people, too many politicians are straight up evil, greedy and in search of power, can we change before doomsday's final hour, or are we already too late, can this really be our destiny/fate, I feel like there should be so much more, take the time to figure out ur purpose and what ur put here for, everyone has a special set of gifts, we need more hip hop music that inspires and uplifts, that's where I come in, why are celebrities no longer role models but just visually and superficially stunning, after all isn't beauty in the eyes of the beholder, why do so many fear getting older, with age comes wisdom, are gays allowed in God's almighty heavenly kingdom, or is that a one way ticket to hell, imagine if there was a fountain of youth or a wishing well, I'd ask for peace on Earth, hunger and poverty makes my soul hurt, how can so few have abundance while others go without, why does life have to be such a bitch/bout, haven't we had enough already, seems I lost the race going slow and steady, maybe they cheated, before u judge look how I've been treated, sacrificed my wants for needs, so others could do what they pleased, achieved their dreams of success, I may not have the newest or the best but I'm blessed, to have good family and friends, some relationships never end, cuz human spirits live on thru memories, Jesus preaches to even love thine enemies, have empathy and compassion, instead of whining and complaining the Pope says take some action, help better urself, health shouldn't only be afforded to those with wealth, it is an inalienable right, for which if we have to will fight, perhaps we're on the verge of another revolutionary war, since that's what happens when the majority of the population is poor!

Peace and 1,
JC
7/18/17    

Already Unsteady

Being in a relationship/partnership, I'm honored beyond shit, but it takes some getting used to and adjusting, it's a lot of sacrifice compromise communication unconditional loving and trusting, which may sound easy but it's not, we really only got one shot, cuz when hearts are broken, no matter what words are spoken, that initial feeling is hard to recapture, patience and forgiveness are both virtues that matter, healing takes time, adultery ain't a crime, but it is a sin, in war no one wins, trading an eye for an eye, leaves sheep blind, what's the point, tit for tat's annoying, all that back and forth, private matters ultimately decided by the courts, but where's the justice, do u know what the difference between love and lust is, why do so many settle for less, hide fear and insecurity behind jest, instead of confronting it head on, we need to shed cons, so we can finally find and understand the truth, the meaning of life seems mysterious and aloof, I'm simply confused, why so much abuse, my soul is being stifled, by the cruel greedy and spiteful, revenge is never the answer, I swear humanity is cancer, we basically spread consume and destroy, don't learn from history falling for the same old ploys, to me it's obvious and clear as day, how come Christians are afraid of the gays, what happened to thou shall not judge, I wonder if God holds a grudge, does karma work, then why are there relentless prosperous jerks, in business u burn bridges to get ahead, don't the rich understand they can't take their money when they're dead, tell me what's the purpose, experiencing such atrocity that hurts us, yet we don't existentially grow or evolve, there's too many difficult problems to solve, we can't even agree, that health care should be inalienably free, what happened to our rights, have we become too numb and dumb to fight, so coddled and spoiled, is there any reason for royals, they seem obsolete and outdated, why has evil perpetuated such discrimination and hatred, it's extremely upsetting, aren't we past hanging electrocution thrown of roofs and/or beheading, it's plain ancient juvenile and silly, no creature on Earth should be taken for granted or considered willy nilly, everything has value and worth, we're all fallible with original sin from birth, living a life without love is the worst, that is the epitome of the definition of cursed, remember to have hope and keep the faith, just in case there is a heaven with pearly gates, the only way to enter, is to be a good virtuous and righteous defender, helping others helps ourselves, stop buying what the devil sells, try to be perfect like Jesus, the children need us, to step up and start leading by being rational adults and positive examples, stand up to oppression and authoritarian dictators trying to trample, we the people united will not be moved, don't u miss when the collective majority ruled, not the electoral college, what happened to morals ethics wisdom and knowledge, we could achieve the quintessential American dream, Congress worked together as a team, and didn't screw over its constituents, kicking the can of fiscal responsibility down the line like lawyers seeking endless continuances, enough is enough already, can u too relate to the X-Ambassador's song "Unsteady"?!  

Peace and 1,
JC
7/7/17

Just Some Food For Thought

Let me ask ya'll a question, do u think life is a curse or blessing, seems to be considered more of a tragedy, how does one measure happy, is it based on money or love, even the most successful eventually fuck up, tell me what the meaning or purpose of existence is, are we only justified or fulfilled having kids, is homosexuality a mental illness or a sin, I'd imagine that's as unanswerable as when did the Earth humanity or time begin, only God has the power to judge right from wrong, what came first the chicken or the egg if even Jesus was immaculately conceived when born, how do we know or find out the real truth, perhaps it's all simply aloof, the galaxy and universe are just too huge to comprehend, our minds like perception can't effectively flexibly bend, why can't man understand, instead of arguing over free will blank slate or predestined divine higher plan, is there a heaven or hell, did the Illuminati cast a protective magical spell, how does one actually become famous, our role models today are superficially shocking and outrageous, there's no basis for value worth or talent, what happened to morals ethics empathy righteousness honor and valiance, why is the world overpopulating when we can't take care of everybody who's already here, when did we become so passive easily manipulated and ruled by fear, who decided democratic capitalism versus socialism is better, the almighty dollar winds up enslaving people and tethers, keeping them trapped stuck poor, do u ever stop and ask urself if there isn't more, I don't think it's selfish, why tell white lies exaggerate and embellish, trying to portray something ur not, who comes up with urban dictionary slang acronyms like swak omg and thot, how does one become an ice cream taster, maybe a title labeler/maker/creator, since I enjoy coming up with catchy names, playing rhyming and other word games, why aren't there more schools for the arts, who was the first to say excuse me after burps and farts, or bless u after sneezing, why am I such an over analyzer deep thinker and sheeple pleaser, there are so many things I wonder and ponder, imagine if we invested in green energy infrastructure and farmers, we would be much more sustainable, I truly believe we don't come close to achieve what we are capable able nor the obtainable, how come the thirst for power and greed is so insatiable, I guess when enough is enough is perpetually debatable, anyway this is just some food for thought, I find each day I learn something new I was never collegiately taught!

Peace and 1,
JC
7/6/17    

Lessening Obnoxiousness With Lyrical Consciousness

There are plenty of days that seem impossibly hard, doomed with gloom feeling like a buffoon right from the start, can't catch a damn green light, ur sly snarky sarcasm drips with disdain u pain why's everything gotta be a fight, last night was the best but we still have the rest of our lives, stop pondering the what ifs u dick don't contemplate manifest destiny's demise, it's a roller coaster ride of a surprise, can't hide from the darkness or light, all the atrocity strife conflict and plight, just actually might make it worth it, shouldn't try to achieve but thrive and believe we're inherently fallibly perfect, so what if u mess up, don't stress about failure nor love, it'll come when ur ready and it's supposed to, but u gotta always remain faithful and hopeful, let ur passions create motivation and action, we can't help yawning in the morning farting hiccupping sneezing breathing or when ur body's freezing tweeking twitching shivering after delivering pissing multiple orgasms or spasms, another god given natural disaster/mass reaction, what's with the crass sassing that's not effectively covering/masking, all the underlying anger fear jealousy hateful ignorant insecurity, fuck u and ur prude attitude with ur grandeur illusions/delusions of purity, I'm a wordy nerdy flirty virtually knee jerky kinky quirky, not many have any knowledge or ever heard of me, like Garth and Wayne claim "we're not worthy", at least not yet, I get high anxiety and manically upset, I'm frustratingly aggravated repressed depressed and obsessed over regret, consumed and entombed by the notion there's no safety net or a fat chick's extra thick supportive cushion, why does the universe disperse hurt worse than an unrehearsed curse that keeps smooshing butchering and pushing, so sick of the shushing, I'm over heated and boiling it's wicked extremely annoying, wish karma wouldn't play games and simply quit toying, big business is evilly greedily manipulating and connivingly exploiting, the cynical cyclical plot absolutely needs foiling or some spoiling, cuz if no one's stepping up for love then what the fuck is the point of this tragic existence, we're all fallibly naive so please don't beg and plead kids for just momentary lust or artificial Utopian bliss, how can u see to achieve goals dreams or purpose without the heavenly divine gift of free will, only u have the ultimate power to choose if u lose or become successfully fulfilled, know tho that money doesn't buy honor trust happiness or respect, what kind of epic legendary legacy do u wanna erect or resurrect to protect, cuz mine's spreading truth love and consciousness, diminishing garbage pop hip hop and bad crap rap's lessening obnoxiousness, giving those beautiful beats inspiring poetic lyrics with deep thought provoking meaningful reason, be a role model icon for future generations of lgbtq and other minority activists to believe in, Pac in his infinite wisdom profoundly stated "it ain't about black or white cuz we're human", "hope we see the light before it's ruined", how did we even get here thru magically unassuming and mystifying unamusing abuse that's plain confusing, time to wake the fuck up shmucks and focus on what all ya'll are doing!

Peace and 1,
JC
7/3/17    

Can't Dispute The Truth I Love U

Tired of all the bickering, and the constant nit picking, take me as I am, but if u can't, tell me now, I'll figure out a way how, to move on without u, gotta do what we've got to, not only to survive, won't settle until I thrive, believe me like Joss sings I'll be "bruised but not broken", once one has been awoken, especially to the notion of love, u can never get enough, it makes life worth living, relationships take hard work compromising sacrifice and forgiving, open and honest communication, unfortunately there ain't no immunization, to failed expectations and disappointment, creating false hope is annoying, perpetuates and frustrates ur temper til it's boiling, ur blood pressure is thru the roof, there's no premeditated maliciousness or intent and that's the truth, I can't justify or dispute, sometimes when I'm doing music my brain/consciousness goes aloof, doesn't mean I don't care or think about u, I'm a naive goof and an ignorant fool, so far from perfect, but I think ur worth it, all the trials tribulations hurdles and obstacles, I'm passionately stubborn and can sometimes be unstoppable/impossible, especially once I make my mind up, there is no kind of, either u do or don't, perhaps u can u just won't, I need a man who rises to the occasion, determined bullish and brazen, yet still modest and humble, laughs at the fact we all stumble fumble and tumble, it's a matter of time, do ya'll think everyone gets at least 15 minutes to shine, when do I get mine, I lie and say I'm fine, but in reality, I don't want to be just another casualty, I wanna leave an epic legacy, empowering people to be the best we can be, by simply being ourselves, success isn't about wealth, why are men so afraid to ask for help, I'm not lesser than for being gay or admitting I've had problems with mental health, so what I've had 2 psychotic breaks, I'll do anything and everything it takes, to make me myself and I stronger and never better, I've been thru and handled much worse weather and tethers, call me Houdini Jr, stop feeding into gossiping assumption and rumors, and don't put words in my mouth, I refuse to raise my voice to scream yell and shout loud, we need to talk TO each other not AT, u really need to know and have faith that I'll hold ur hand and got ur back, thru the thick and thin, I won't judge u based on ur past sins, but I expect the same reciprocity in return, u could never be a bridge burned, cuz for u I'll come to the table, travel to the edge of the Earth and beyond if I'm capable and able, move mountains and swim seas, I'm being sincere when I say ur the love of not only my life but fantasies and dreams, forever ever and always Kevin, even in the afterlife if I have to I'll find u in heaven!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/29/17

A Blessed Mess Still Standing & Breathing

Ur only as old as u feel, at 35 things start to get really real, it's my half life, don't wanna have to ask twice, let alone repeat shit, failure isn't defeated, like a phoenix rise, there's a fine line between attaining knowledge and being street wise, I wonder what wrenches the universe will throw in, karma's worse than the energizer bunny that keeps on keeping on and going, reminding evil people there are consequences to every action, never give up on ur hopes wishes dreams or passions, aspire to inspire, helping others to reach higher, becoming our best selves, love is way more important than acquiring great wealth, focus on staying healthy, I'm like the wicked witch of the west we're his scented sweat melts me, must be all those pheromones, he's got such a manly aggressive dominant tone, that drives me crazy insanely wild, super addicted to preferring spicy over mild, what's first and foremost important/critical/crucial, is to be just urself extra special and uniquely unusual, fuck flaws and petty differences, search deep down inside stop getting caught up with superficial images, it shouldn't matter if ur black white short tall fat or skinny, if ur butt boobs feet hands vag or penis are mini, it's the size of ur heart actually, souls are growing cold unempathetically nasty unnaturally, from fear repression shame and regret, once we fuck up this God given Earth there won't be any humanity left, because we need and feed each other, hence her nickname is mother, and breaking the bonds that hold the circle of life together, perpetuates pollution and extreme destructive cataclysmic weather, without an o-zone all is lost, ur ridiculously rich famous and successful but at what cost, sick of the FDA and EPA not doing their jobs neglecting protecting, this past election with Russia meddling was genuinely upsetting/unsettling, haven't quite recovered, Trump 2020 has got me stuttered and shuttered, must've randomly contracted Turrets, how quickly the sheeple forgets, as the tyrant leads us off the cliff, we let him split the masses in fact it's causing a huge rift, it's an old school text book trick called divide and conquer, across the whole globe the United States Of America's becoming disgustingly disgraced and dishonored, we're nothing without our stellar reputation, enforcing immigration laws thru deputation, makes us collectively seem discriminatory and prejudiced, I didn't care for the host or show "The Apprentice, he is the antithesis of business savvy, him and his mail ordered bride filed multiple bankruptcies to live lavishly, it's all a false facade/charade/optical illusion, by creating mass hysteria panic and confusion, he's simply distracting with the same ole shit smoke and mirrored politics, isn't it clearer now maybe even blatantly obvious, he has no clue what the hell he's doing, can't listen to or take the hate he's continuously recklessly spewing, they say laughter is the best medicine, but believing in and understanding the deplorable's logic hurts my head again, there ain't no rhyme or reason, how he hasn't yet been impeached for treason, defies rationale common sense and meaning, but I guess I'll digress before I get upset remembering I'm blessed to awake and face the taste/test of another day I jest I'm a mess yet still standing and breathing!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/28/17

The Crazy Absolutely Amazes Me

Trying to live healthier, how does one become wealthier, seems kind of funny, it takes money to make money, another catch 22, while dichotomy and hypocrisy ensue, why does life seem so tragic, do u believe in magic, how about karma God or fate/destiny, anxiety and fear have been getting the best of me, no amount of drugs counselling or therapy helps, and there's no one to blame but ourselves, the selfish ego gains control, completely taking over our soul, so we're trapped in our own bubble, unaware of the global financial trouble, short sighted and unsocialistic, imagine going holistic or exploring the mystics, herbal remedies are much more bodily friendly, capitalistic consumerism has taken a toll both environmentally and mentally, we worship the almighty dollar, more than worthy talented experienced scholars, modern day celebrities aren't good role models icons or idols, superficial materialism's destroyed what's valued and vital, we're so fucking screwed up, marriage isn't supposed to be about business but unconditional love, enough with it only being allowed, for a man and a woman to exchange vows, we don't need no church, ur ignorant discrimination really hurts, why shouldn't we adopt kids, especially if we provide a better place for them to grow and live, shut ur face with ur judgmental opinions, ur mean sarcasm isn't justified by simply saying just kidding, a lot of truth is said in jest, drunkenness is synonymous with depressed, maybe at one time u were adorable, but now ur another deplorable, so hateful ungrateful and naive, totally consumed by power and greed, it's weird there's a majority of working poor, I hate and can't take oxymorons anymore, not all gays are promiscuous whores, just like spike-haired meatheads aren't all from Jersey Shore, surfer dudes aren't only from Cali actually, evolution is supposed to happen naturally, perhaps my poems are too existential, success isn't guaranteed but death is blatantly inevitable, until then tho, enjoy the shit show, as this once great nation unravels, our government officials should be scared of the ultimate gavel, cuz they masqueraded as by and for we the people, unfortunately their true intentions promote pure evil, got duped again by wolves in sheep clothing, anyone who unabashedly claims they're all knowing, are clearly plain psycho delusional and crazy, how any rational human being can deny climate change absolutely amazes me, guess we're cursed to never learn, trust love and respect can't be bought only earned!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/27/17

Alleviate The Wait & Existentially Elevate

I finally caught up on work, but I bet there's a few invoices that linger and lurk, somewhere around here, unemployment brings profound fear, jobs are truly scarce these days, not everyone wants to please or appease gays, ever felt tolerated yet not accepted, losing the popular vote by 3 million yet Trump was still collegiately elected, I don't think that should count, without his tax returns we'll never know the specific amount, of how much money he has or conflicts of interest, haven't used Snapchat Twitter or Pinterest, cuz I'm not very technologically savvy, more of a pacifist than scrappy, but I won't run away from a fight, rather use vocabulary words that bite instead of being trite, phrases that are both rhetorical and metaphorical, historical but also absorbable, even mother nature's bipolar with day and night darkness and light, that's the dichotomy of life, with the ying and the yang, when some sing they lose their accent/twang, it's actually pretty funny, like a rumbly grumbly hungry tummy, growling out loud, hate when the sky's shrouded by clouds, means a storm is coming, can do without guitar stings strumming, a capella style, always try to smile, it helps make people feel good, why is it only the real hood, who make it in hip hop and rap, the tick tock of the clock smacks back, reminding me there's no reverse, short bursts of time spurts hurts, those looking for more than 15 minutes of fame, prefer a long lasting career in the music game, over a lame one hit wonder, which is considered a blunder thunder plunderer, taking away my notoriety and publicity, the promoter producer or manager hired was wicked shitty, cuz I'm old school valiant passionate with lots of talent, since I'm a Gemini tho it's hard to find balance, teetering between extremes, need extra squeegees please, to sop up these celebratory tears, winning a Grammy perhaps will take years, but there ain't no stopping, til I'm radio chart topping, I'm destined for greatness, measuring awakeness, after spreading my album called "Truth Love & Consciousness", enough with this horrifying obnoxiousness, I want to create works of art that are positively inspiring, altering perception and hard wiring combating the bitching and whining, may seem impossible, but in all actuality it's really only improbable, if we have the courage to alleviate the wait, and finally existentially elevate!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/26/17

Too Much To Ask/So Unreasonable

This is the second poem I wrote today, I'm not sharing the other one that's consumed with anger frustration and hate, sometimes I just need to vent, never learned the skill of being disingenuous or playing pretend, so I have to keep some shit to myself, holding onto negativity is detrimental to my health, I'll hide it in my diary, there's nothing more special and fulfilling then when someone compliments they admire me, to me music and poetry are second nature, I wish I could be the world's savior, cuz we are stuck in very dark times, I wanna be the bright white light that shines, leading and showing lost souls the way, it's ok to be gay, it's not a mental disorder or disease, be careful not to people please, cuz ull lose urself, we all need a lil help, stop acting so proud, this isn't a dick swinging contest so it doesn't matter if ur well endowed, just be a good person, if ur situation isn't working, u shouldn't complain, perhaps it's time to change, either ur circumstance or location, what's with this never ending generational discrimination, we perpetually pass it on, eventually masses bond, and unity creates power, together we will make the tyrants pay and cower, aren't u tired of being taken advantage of and conned, there's no such thing as Jesus Santa or magical wands, get used to it, enough with the abusive shit, fucking with the truth, karma will catch up to u, webs of lies, definitely demise, cuz the good triumphs and love conquers all, the law of gravity states what rises falls, life is a combination of a see-saw and a merry-go-round, am I alone thinking existentially profound, too smart with a big heart, meaning I'm double doomed from the start, I am not a punching bag, nor some door mat, u can walk all over, like Edwin McCain "I'll be ur crying shoulder", until u cross my boundary line, Trump is a sign of the time, evil has taken a strong hold, imagine being Benjamin Button born old, aging in reverse, fate is a curse, hating hurts, modern day slavery's work, only the one percent have the luxury of being free, why don't they see their greed, damages the collective, wish cops and Congress actually protected, we the people, we're looked upon as worthless and feeble, I know utopia and peace on Earth isn't feasible, but why can't we use common sense share resources and get along...is that too much to ask/so unreasonable?

Peace and 1,
JC
6/23/17

Open Our Mind's Eye's Consciousness

Still wearing my rainbow Pulse/Pride bracelet, together any obstacle we can face and ace it, just gotta keep the faith, which doesn't necessarily mean pray, u are the strongest man I know, look how far uve come and grown, uve got much more of a troubled past, but I have hope that this relationship will last, because of all that we've been thru, it's not as important what u did as what u do, take each problem as they arise, don't get caught up in gossip assumption and lies, especially the ones we tell ourselves, try to find healthy ways of reducing stress helps, hence why I run do yoga and write, I don't like how lately we fight, but it clearly shows, we both will go toe to toe, coming back to the table, when there's a foundation of love we're much more willing and able, to sacrifice and compromise, remember life is a seesaw with lots of lows and highs, ride the ebbs and flows, nobody knows what the future holds, so stop worrying about and predicting the what ifs, soul mates are the ultimate gift, seize the moment, u don't own shit, everything's on loan, what's the point to bitch and moan, there's only so much within our own control, leave the rest up to God Jesus or the holy ghost, do u ever wonder about divine intervention, perhaps this is all a dream an illusion or inception, be gracious and grateful of blessings, don't get too caught up in exterior superficial masks and dressings, discover the truth, which is often aloof, by digging deep, focus on what u reap, take responsibility and hold urself accountable, nothing is impossible or insurmountable, if u put ur heart into it u can accomplish anything, not many can inherently rap and sing, like having the natural ability to dance, got guts or the balls to take an against the grain activist stance, it takes courage perpetual passion action and drive, we all have a meaning or reason why we're alive, pay attention to friction, watch out for overindulgence obsession and addiction, it's easy to lose our way, it shouldn't matter if ur straight bi trans or gay, love and marriage are inalienable rights, incessant prejudice and discrimination bites, can't we existentially evolve, work towards solutions that solve, poverty hunger AIDs Alzheimer's cancer war homelessness and global warming, ya'll need to open ur mind's eye's consciousness to realize signs and warnings, there's only one life and one world, we're all the metaphorical diamond in the rough/quintessential pearl, extremely special and unique, now is not the time to run and hide give up cower or retreat, firmly stand our ground, the results could be life changing altering and profound!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/21/17

Find Strength In Love

If I call ya'll out, it's not cuz I wanna bout, I know u can do better, life ain't all about the cheddar, it's about finding ur true love and soul mate, growing old's fate, and time is not on our side, so enjoy the ride, in it's ups and downs twists and turns, getting ghosted burns, sometimes tho u gotta move on, out of sight out of mind doesn't mean uve been conned, like seasons people change, best friends become estranged, but ull always have those moments, when u fuck up say I'm sorry and make atonement, as they say forgive but don't forget, no use getting frustrated and upset, especially when things are beyond our control, instead of reap what u sow we receive that which we dole, it's a different way of saying the same thing, why u keep bitching about it raining, use an umbrella or go singing, stop hyper-analyzing and overthinking, it'll give u stress lines and wrinkles, u trying to break the record of Rip Van Winkle, like Nas raps "sleep is the cousin of death", u should feel grateful and blessed to get up out of bed, be happy it's a new day and u can take another breath, imagine hearing God sing "to the left...to the left", humans aren't like Beyonce's song "Irreplaceable", I often wonder if peace or utopia is even feasible or capable, or if it's an ignorant naive notion, I'd climb any mountain and cross oceans, to be with my man, love was just a fairy tall tale mythical illusion before he helped me understand, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, watch out for those cat phishers and trollers, they'll private message naked pics and flirt, please don't feed into gossiping assumption and presumptuous dirt, get to know others for urself, jumping in to a relationship for wealth, makes u a bad person/gold digger, playing the victim is a big pet peeve/trigger, basically that means, ur simply blaming me, I take responsibility for my actions, I often get caught up in passion, and I lose my mind, that's why I refrain from judgment and write rhymes, to review and organize my thoughts, cuz I worry about being overly dramatic or too irrationally distraught, avoid manipulation guilt tripping and pity, confront conflict face facts fears and the shitty nitty-gritty, it'll help u to learn and grow, experiencing tragedy makes u appreciate triumph that's how dichotomy goes, when stricken with adversity, don't sit there crying begging for mercy, the universe won't feel sorrow, karma's a wicked witch and'll take away tomorrow, shouldn't get caught up in the past stay in the here and now, I wish I knew just how proud, my accomplishments actually make u, it's impossibly hard for a gay white middle class rapper to break thru, but I won't ever give up, I have never ending hope and faith only because I find the strength in love!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/20/17  

Everything's Profoundly Backwards & Upside Down

We just celebrated Pride weekend, but when will capitalistic consumerist culture break or bend, cuz it is absolutely deplorable/disgusting, the lack of value substance and service for ur cover is troubling, trying to exploit the lgbtq community, shouldn't we get immunity, or some sort of benefit, instead u reward our nemesis, fuck big business, this economy is ridiculous, rewarding greed, promoting materialistic envy, money doesn't buy happiness, most drag queens misunderstand the difference between bitchiness and sassiness, plus they're a dime a dozen, representing a curmudgeon, I'm disappointed in what we've become, so ignorant unempathetic dumb and numb, guess we sold our souls, equality is supposed to be the ultimate goal, yet we're more separated and divided, have forgotten why Stonewall even rioted, not so we could parade around naked all intoxicated, but to try and alleviate unnecessary discrimination and hatred, who says marriage is only between a woman and a man, love is love what the fuck is so hard to understand, it's impossible not to believe we're damned and doomed, look at all technology has ruined, especially human interaction and connection, sorry but I still can't get over he who shall not be named's election, it's like we regressed back to the dark ages, aren't ya'll sick of the homophobic misogynistic religious extremists and racists, what the heck is wrong with people, when did we succumb to evil, I'll always fight for light, practice what I preach and teach wrong from right, it's literally common sense, no wonder why we're all on edge and tense, there's no more trust, too many prefer casual lust, seems we lost the will to work, karma's on strike so nobody gets what they deserve, everything's backwards and upside down, change is necessary and it needs to be swift and profound, perhaps I'm losing myself in the bigger picture, wish there was some sort of magical potion spell or elixir, to fix this shit, every breath is a gift, and gives us an opportunity to make things better, maybe I am a naive stubborn passionate idealistic hopeful romantic go getter, but I won't stop, til the virtuous righteous good rise again to the top, so they reign and it eventually trickles, it's ok to be fallible and fickle, we all make mistakes and have preferences, use other's and past experience as references, be in competition with no one but urself, and just remember it's not weak to ask for or get help!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/19/17

Why Does Success Seem To Mean Loveless

My man is way sexier than me, look at his pics if u don't agree, he's got striking features, and I'm one of those talented cute creatures, guess it's all a matter of taste, some think we're rushing into things with haste, but we only live once, and I'd rather not be a dunce, when it comes to love it's not a competition, follow ur heart gut and intuition, otherwise u become numb consumed with regret, ya'll better not be placing relationship bets, I hate evil people rooting for failure, I use my experiences and hurdles like Taylor, put it all into my poetry and music, don't sweep up shit under the rug use it, be smart and learn from ur mistakes, nothing is free easy or cake, at least not the really good stuff, still getting used to the scruff, but my boyfriend likes it, as well as bites shit, like my face lips and butt, I'm working on diminishing this gut, not for any purpose other than being healthy, with u by my side I can be broke yet still wealthy, cuz at the end of the day, I want substance not quick dick or some fantasy kinky lay, he is the one I dream of, taught me what Mary J meant by "Real Love", yes it's true only time will tell, but I'd imagine without him my existence would be hell, break down those walls and out of ur shell, take big risks instead of believing in superstitious imaginary wishing wells, God doesn't hand magical answers, do ya'll think there's a meaning or reason for aids and cancer, while we may be growing older, we're both getting hotter not colder, like fine wine, haven't peaked or reached our potential shine, I have faith the best is yet to come, ain't no one and done, milk me repeatedly until I'm shooting blanks, all these vampires need to retract their fangs, stop draining the life force sucking blood, have hot sex instead of jerking off to filthy smut, ya'll sluts should back the fuck up, control ur addiction of lust, cuz my guy is married, I feel bad for Mariah Carey, to have so much success, but perpetually loveless, I really think most men are threatened, paparazzi Nazis keep invading and meddling, leave the poor woman alone, worry about u and ur own home, if u are booing and poo pooing her for trying, don't act all surprised when, karma comes back to u bitch, how long have u been hitched, like Pac said "only God can judge me now", I never understand or can comprehend how, humans won't open their eyes to see, they're the very definition/epitome of hypocrisy, we reap what we sow, and wanna remind ya'll the one thing I truly know is we don't know what the future holds, but the power to change and be better is in our control, I hope the legacy I leave is filled with empathy consciousness and soul!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/16/17

Resist & Persist For Good Shit To Flourish

There's a tough dichotomy between being open and honest, yet remaining humble and modest, straight forward and direct, but don't fall victim to the mean sarcasm or selfish ego effect, what's better white lies or the blunt truth, be careful what u choose, cuz neither can be taken back, screw omission gossiping assumption and alternative facts, I've had enough of the gay drama and bullshit, u need to learn when someone extends their finger and says pull it, not to gullibly follow thru, or when asked who sings a song say it's u, otherwise u fall for their trap/trick, what's better a dick that's long or thick, prefer cut or uncut, not attracted to politically correct generic dumb fucks, cuz I'm all about chemistry and connection, I'm trying to live my life happy and fulfilled not swayed by negativity's infection, which isn't easy, definitely don't want to be identified as manipulative or sleazy, I accept the consequences for my mistakes, and for the rest of my existence will do whatever it takes, to win back trust, prove to u it's not just sex and lust, I am truly madly deeply in love, and I simply won't walk away or give up, I'm a passionate fighter and stubborn, want to minimize drinking drugging barring and clubbing, to spend more quality intimate fun time just u and me, pretty sure ud agree, we both have plenty of personal stuff to work on, but know this is not some deceptive illusion or con, I wanna be a positive example, and refuse to let random outsiders come between us trying to ruin and trample, the hard work traveling this long lonely windy road, I use my past experiences as lessons to learn how to adapt and grow, please remember tho I am far from perfect, trials and tribulations suck but in the end I find they're worth it, usually atrocity helps provoke real change, this position I'm in is completely off-putting and strange, believe me I'm scared as hell, my insecurities and confusion can seem impossible to show iterate express or tell, worried u won't be there when or if I fell, there's no magical solution potion nor spell, gotta navigate the twists turns valleys and hills, resist and persist even if it kills, it's all about the journey the fight whether u phoenixly resurrect and rise, why do men see vulnerability as weakness and abhor tears being cried in another guy's eyes, it takes such courage and strength, divulging secrets pent up anger frustration and resentment is therapeutic to vent, holding onto that crap, hiding behind an awkward uncomfortable dismissive laugh, is not a good way to deal, only when u can admit how u feel, getting to the heart and root of the pleasure or pain, can knowledge and wisdom be gained, communication's laying the bricks of our relationship's foundation, too much corruption and greed is what's destroying this once sound nation, with a tyrant at the helm, many are disgustingly disgruntled detached and overwhelmed, hopefully this'll lead to some sort of new Renaissance era, where inspiring good music art morals ethics and talent flourish are appreciated prioritized coveted worth more and valued greater/better!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/14/17

Change The Collective's Perspective

Some mornings it's a fight to figure out what to write, should I go deep angry inspirational or just keep it light, I have no control on the soul, guess I'm like the weather both hot and cold, after all I am a Gemini, off stage I'm pretty reserved and shy, not afraid to cry, or ask why, instead of accepting that's the way it is, how come there's no heart or humanity in business, it's simply about the money, but what I find funny, is that it's the root of all evil, brings out the worst in and consumes people, like without it we have no value, now-a-days we work cuz we have to, life is very expensive, the list of debts and bills is quite extensive, seems to be an insurmountable hole, which takes an overwhelming toll, that makes it hard to get up out of bed, do the rich realize they can't take it when they're dead, each day is a struggle, any dents or progress are super subtle, almost nonexistent, when it comes to my music tho I'm persistent, I don't care about the obstacles or paying the price, getting a song played on the radio would be nice, but winning a Grammy would be even better, instead of sending one to Santa I'll pen Pac a letter, telling him how much I love and admire, think tho he was a thug his spirit still rose higher, up to the heavens, u showed me hip hop is service for benevolents, who sacrifice their own life, by sharing their stories and experiences of pain hardship and strife, remember nobody is perfect, helping others is totally worth it, cuz it helps ourselves, I'm not in it for fame or wealth, I sincerely want to connect and relate, there's no such thing as a successful mainstream middle class white rapper who's gay, think it's about fucking time, may not be a freestyler but got sick poetic stream of consciousness rhymes, definitely one of a kind, got lots of hot topics on the mind, I wanna change the collective's perspective, sorry but I don't understand why Bernie wasn't elected, I swear he was our modern day savior, FDR used socialism to make this country greater, capitalism just isn't the answer, sometimes I truly believe human beings are cancer, we always fuck shit up, the only way to heal this world is with the power of love!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/7/17

Let Go The Inconsequential

Rubbernecking is negatively effecting traffic, I get road rage but wish I could just laugh at it, learn to let it go, dismiss the shit as inconsequential, cuz holding on to that level of anger and hate, doesn't stop u from being late, simply exacerbates ur blood pressure rising, people don't appreciate empathy nor compromising, both of which are an art form, love keeps the heart warm, but sometimes it ain't enough, relationships can be tough, especially if ur not getting what u need, selfishness is a big pet peeve, u gotta believe things work out the way they're supposed to, I'm not promiscuously slutty the way gay hoes do, kind of a prude dude, misconstrued as rude, cuz of resting bitch face, finding a soul mate isn't a race, it'll happen when it does, some have multiple loves, while others simply miss out, but if u repetitively pessimistically pout, ull turn off many, if anything I'm overly friendly, and when I'm being nice or polite, ya'll assume I wanna make out blow u or go home with u that night, which couldn't be further from the truth, my boyfriend is a beaut to boot, so I'm not looking for more, nor interested in hookering whores, he's "all the man I need" like Whitney sang, it's never a quick fuck/bang, sex for us takes hours, ur not less than a man for crying liking pink purple Mariah Carey or flowers, usually homophobes are discrete undercover cowards, first to put their asses up and/or wear collars, if they're muscle juice heads or dominant in life, it's ironic they like being humiliated degraded and in bed play the wife, meaning they're submissive or the receiver, I actually feel bad for Michael Jackson and Justin Beiber, they totally missed out on just being kids, read my lips, money isn't the be all and end all, remember the law of gravity what rises must fall, even success comes with a price, normally their love life bites, it's impossible to know who u can really trust, fame and fortune induce lust, it takes passion and guts to fulfill hopes and dreams, nothing is ever as easy as it seems, even being born into wealth, can be detrimental to ur mental and heart health, the specific struggles may vary, but we all have similar instances and feelings of pain envy and happy, one person's trash is another's treasure, failures shouldn't be measured, what's important is how high u bounce back and rise, don't listen to gossip hearsay or lies, get to know and understand first hand, I wonder if God laughs or chuckles when we plan, not a fan of Fantasyland, prefer pools over the beach cuz there's no sand, getting everywhere including the nooks and crannies, terribly miss my grammies and grampies, they used to spoil me to death, with them gone I feel like I'm walking a tight rope without a safety net, but I have faith they've become angels watching over my shoulder, will my legacy be passed down too when it's all said and done and over?

Peace and 1,
JC
6/6/17

Innocence Or Ignorance

Our bickering isn't hateful sickening snickering, in the beginning instead of a baptism like Charmed we'll do a wiccaning, we show love a different way, sarcasm's the gay's quintessential spilling of the T/shade, it's not meant to be nay say, stop reminiscing and vicariously living like ur still in ur hey day, grow the fuck up, oh u don't appreciate when I cuss, well tough luck, notice the scruff, I'm an adult, homosexuality is not a cult, perhaps it could be considered a religion, it's also not a choice or a decision, the amount of negligent ignorance, can no longer pass as unintentional innocence, we need to draw some hard lines, why do they try to dim how bright a star shines, by spreading deadening and upsetting meddling, look at all the evil that's embedding getting and settling, deep within our collective soul, if we don't start accepting climate change is real and man made Earth will become a giant black hole, both the North and South pole, keep losing their cold, ice caps are melting, what's the deal with people bible belting, hating and discriminating in the name of Jesus, the US can't just do what appeases or pleases us, what happened to fighting for the greater good, Republicans aren't doing what they know they should, and it is simply upsetting, how quickly we're forgetting, wondering how we got to this point, I'm beyond irritated and annoyed, I'm wicked pissed off, while ya'll bitterly snicker and scoff, acting selfish arrogant and righteous, seems we can't even fathom let alone fight this, sick and twisted mentality, where sheeple get brave behind virtual reality, so socialism and human interaction becomes numb too awkward or weird, government divides and conquers thru abusing using fear, yet we fall for it every time, excessive greed should be a crime, there's no reason one person family or corporation needs billions of dollars, I feel as tho scholar's degrees are collars, making us slaves to capital and our careers, nobody wants to be a teacher they wanna be JT or Britney Spears, how the heck are u supposed to know, what u want to be or do for the rest of ur life at 17 or 18 years old, we idolize shows like 16 and pregnant or Teen Mom, how do ya'll remain calm, cuz I'm about to lose my cool/shit, I despise his lies and don't like the fact Trump rules one bit, he's making a mockery of our democracy, it's impossible to handle the day to day shockery, there's always something, with the orange pumpkin, I swear he's colluding with the Russians and Putin, terrorism and war are disintegrating and ruining, the whole globe's at odds, please tell me if u think Utopian peace is naive wishful thinking or a complete farce?!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/5/17

  

No Pussies Allowed

Tonight is gonna be incredible, the nice thing about typing instead of writing my lyrics is they're always legible, maybe tho not understood, don't wanna be too book smart nor hood, I'm Italian gangster not ghetto, I'm def thick but not squishy like jello, but I do in fact taste great, think I finally met the man of my dreams/soulmate, fuck all ur jealousy and hate, too impatient to wait and will do whatever it takes, to follow thru on my promise of forever, I won't wanna live unless it's together, cuz we can weather any storm, we define our own relationship rules and norms, it is absolutely true, I unconditionally love u, will u be my one and only, console and comfort me whenever I'm lost insecure or lonely, like Meth and Mary J say "ur all I need to get by", ur the drug Toni Braxton sang about that's "making me high", unless I'm down on the ground on all fours, while our Alessia Cara soundtrack's playing "baby I'm urs", it smells of locker room stink cum and poppers galore, ur stuck with me hubby for richer or poorer, I wanna have pups lil piggies and a bunch of gaybies, ur sexual prowess is extremely lustful like ur rabid with rabies, ur animalistic, threatening to bite my face off cuz ur cannibalistic, even without bath salts, what's with all the mad cat calls, from both men and women, isn't it obvious why I'm ear to ear grinning, we were up the entire night, til the birds were chirping from the morning's first light, shouldn't kiss and tell rather be respectful and polite, being with u just feels right, will u "stay with me" Sam Smith style for the rest of my life, sorry not sorry neither of us is the wife, so take ur ignorant presumptuousness, and stick it up another slut's butt that's not half as juicy or scrumptious, we like to tag team tease, please...ain't no freebies, u gotta work for the honor and privilege, my gorgeous alpha dom stud would be crazy livid, look but don't touch, no pussies allowed we love it rough, a lil exotic and kinky, no rinky dinky or wrinkly, just scruffy young jocks, who worship cock, and if u can't handle this, keep ur tongue off my tit's nips and pits, since it stimulates heavenly bliss, what a shame u missed out on the opportunity to kiss these lips, now ur too late, get irate with fate, destiny has other plans, u can try to divide but ya'll don't really stand a chance, but for a chosen few spectators/fans, u may catch a glance voyeuring while we dirty dance, after all everyone can be enticed and has a price, care to push ur luck and roll the dice, u might get trussed up tight without speech or sight, nobody said life was fair or that we play nice!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/2/17

Defeating Comparing & Competing

I've been on a roller coaster ride, my emotions erratically going from lows to extreme highs, it was my 35th birthday last week, and I'm wondering if I've peaked, too soon or perhaps late, I often wonder if we have a predestined fate or if destiny is a blank slate, in which we have semi control, maybe only God knows, if it even exists, I'd rather use wits and psychological tricks than fists, fighting doesn't seem to solve issues, please stop making me use tissues, I'm tired of crying, from all the back stabbing gossiping and lying, u never get anything in life unless u express it, why second guess shit, follow a combination of logic and gut, can't find love in bars or clubs so I tried Scruff, and it totally worked, just when I got close to happiness so came jealous jerks and that hurt, cuz many claimed to be my friend, I definitely don't like the idea of long time relationships coming to an end, especially over hear say and third party rumors, I'm a hip hop rapper emcee never claimed to be one of those superstar crooners, altho I have a deep raspy old school style voice, who and what u love and are passionate about isn't really a choice, why must I pay the price, for other people's shortcomings regrets and unfulfilled dreams in their own life, I am what I am cuz I work hard and very driven, I'm gracious and giving even on days that aren't Christmas Easter Valentines Day or Thanksgiving, I am simply a genuinely good person, who actively seeks to see the best in people instead of all the evil that's lurking, cuz otherwise I'd never get up out of bed, smoking too much pot got me trapped overthinking in my head, still trying to take each day one moment at a time, having a big heart and lots of empathy shouldn't be a crime, don't say ur fine if ur not, put ur heart and soul in everything and give it all u got, cuz time and life are precious unpredictable not promised commodities, I love Kevin even with his faults flaws and oddities, we can't pick and choose, but u can follow all the rules and still lose, unfortunately nothing seems to be fair or just, gay men in particular are sluts for sex and lust, and it's destroying our reputation and perception, please don't let me be effected by all the bad shit so I become numb untrusting and afraid to show or let in affection, stop underestimating the importance of human interaction and touch, there's absolutely nothing more amazingly beautiful and healing like big bear hugs, fuck fucking or dick sucking I think the most intimate is kissing, I'd rather not start missing truly living cuz I'm too caught up comparing competing hoping and wishing!

Peace and 1,
JC
6/1/17